Jello Tired

**whiney post alert**

There I gave you a warning so you can stop reading if you are going to judge me for my post. If you do choose to keep reading don’t worry it wont be too long, my fingers hurt. So here goes… Today I am tired, like the kind of tired that feels like you are moving through a bowl of jello tired, have been all week really. No I don’t stay up too late and no I don’t party hard, unfortunately that is just my life. Heck last Thursday I went to the cook off, didn’t stay too late and barely had anything to drink, and this is the end result of a good time. Auto Immune Sucks…can I get an Amen??? Being tired I can handle. I argue with myself about getting up everyday, but I still do it and make it to work on time. I drink coffee but it doesn’t do much, with the exception of tasting amazing, and making me feel warm and fuzzy and my fog in my head somewhat clears. But being tired and hurting, now that I can handle… most days. Today I am not doing so good at handling it. The pain is random and sometimes I hurt in places I didn’t even know had feeling and some days I just cant take it anymore. Today is that day. I haven’t felt that great all week, and I am just over it. My fingers hurt and I type all day, my hips hurt and I sit a lot, I have a few other pains that literally make me think wtf, how in the world does that hurt and omg can it please stop. So on top of being jello tired, I am in pain and you can please stick a fork in me because I am done. So I guess that is it… That is my rant for today… If someone could please tell me where the off switch is I would greatly appreciate it.

Friends... when the shit hits the fan.

Have you ever sat back and looked at your friends and family, I mean really look at them. Look at how they treat you, look at how they treat others, and then look at your life as a whole. Have you ever looked around and thought to yourself if the shit ever hits the fan I know I can depend on all of these people in my life? Most of you cannot say that. Most of you think you know the people you are friends with but do you really? Sometimes it takes going through a pretty bad moment in your life to realize just who has your back and who doesn't and after that happens and you lose all of your so called friends you learn how to pick them. You learn the qualities you are looking for in a friend. You learn who is worth your time and who just isn't. They say that is part of growing up... and at the time when you feel all alone and lost it really sucks. But in the end you are stronger because you survived. I look at the friends I have in my life at this very moment, and I realize how different they are than the friends I thought I had before. Facebook is so kind to remind me of the friends that I have lost with the "on this day" posts but I no longer look at it as a bad loss. I look at it as how much better my life is without that kind of negativity in my life. I look at it as the bullet I dodged losing that person or persons as a friend. I am at peace with it... Because in the end, looking at it now, I am surrounded by some strong amazing people. People who see my flaws and love me anyways. I don't have a ton of friends, but the ones I do have count. The ones I do have can know that when the shit hits the fan I will be there by their side, doing everything I can and then some.