The Valentines Day Stigma

Let me start this post with the below statement:

I am not a bitter person, nor is my relationship a reflection of how I feel about Valentines Day. I have always felt the way I describe below.

I am very happy and very much in love so please don't go assuming that this must be a scorned woman's rant.

 

I've never been one to believe that Valentine's Day was a day of love. I tend to believe that you should show the person you love that you love them every day- not just on one single day of the year.

See I believe that you should show the one you love that you love them all the time. Buy her flowers for no reason on a Tuesday, in the middle of the week, not because you're in trouble, not because a holiday says that you should but merely because you want to. Bring her Reese's pieces on a day when she's had a bad day and you know she could use that guilty little pleasure... post sweet things on Facebook about each other every day of the year or just randomly as you see fit but not because a hallmark holiday told you to. Ladies this goes for you too... Spoil your man because he deserves to be spoiled. This game of love is a two way street, every day of the year.

I rather enjoy seeing all of the love on Facebook, all the happy couples that posted pictures and that were professing their love for one another. The image portrayed of how happy they were together, that image is how it should be all the time not because some holiday told you should. Pronounce it to everybody all the time because Lord only knows that love is work, it's not easy, heck life is not easy either but with the one that you love, with the person that makes it all better life is worth it. 

I've always thought the Valentine's Day was almost an insult for the single people out there, a reminder to all the single parents that they're doing this alone, a reminder to all the single windows that their husbands have passed long before them,  a reminder to anyone that just hasn't met that love of their life that they are alone and what better way to remind them with all the chocolates and all the cards and all of the red and pink crap in stores at this time a year.

It is a reminder that if they want chocolates or they want flowers or balloons they need to buy it themselves... it's sad really. The amount of money we spend on one day of the year is ridiculous... The amount of money parents shell out for their kids to participate in the festivities at school is all just a waste.

What about the kid that doesn't get a valentine.. or God for bid, when they used to do the carnations at school and you had to buy one for yourself just to make sure that you weren't the only one left out when they delivered them to the classroom because how embarrassing is that, to be the one that didn't get one. I'm guilty of that I'm guilty of buying myself a carnation because I didn't want to be the person that didn't have one and sometimes I was the only one that bought one for me and that in itself is depressing. This whole stigma that is set upon us from a young age, telling us that this is what we need to do because this is a holiday that is there to show love.Well I don't believe in it, I don't believe that a holiday should make us be the person that we need to be 365 days a year. I don't believe that a holiday should define who we are because in all honesty if you can't do that every single day, if you can't be that person every single day who are you fooling really. Who are you pretending to be one day out of the year because it certainly not yourself.

As imperfect as that may be...

I am not perfect. There I said it, shocker right??? Just kidding, but in reality no one is. I think it would be terribly exhausting to even try to be perfect all the time. I don't wake up every morning and stress about how I look, nor do I care. I don't pretend to have it all together, because I don't. Yes sometimes I amaze myself when I get on a roll but that does not mean I don't make mistakes.  You can make yourself look perfect on paper, or on the book face for that matter, but you are not. Not saying we don't try to be perfect in our own ways but we just were just not made to be perfect. Perfect looks does not mean you are a great person, being a great person does not mean you have it all together. Perfection is just not feasible.
With all that being said we really should not expect perfection from each other. We should not judge each other for our looks, or for our mistakes, we should embrace them and lift them up and be a support system. I say should because more often than not we don't. We tear each other down and add to the stress of others already stressful lives and we hang each other out to dry. I am guilty as charged. Why? Because I am not perfect.
I can sit here and tell you all the things we should do, all the things I should do, but executing them is the hard part. All I can really do is say I will try harder... but if I fail I wont beat myself up... After all... I am only human as imperfect as that may be...